Rabid Love!
by John.B-1859
Summary: "Ever since I got attacked by that goose, I feel funny. Especially when I'm around Himawari... OH MY GOD DO I HAVE RABIES?" Sakurako thinks that she has rabies, but does she really? Perhaps it's something else... (Yuri, SakuHima, Rated T for foul language and cartoonish violence.)
1. Chapter 1 -Goose Ambush!-

_**Author's note!**_

 _ **This is my first ever FanFiction! It's written in a rather, unconventional style. So I ask..  
**_ _ **Can you at least give it a shot? I swear, you won't regret it!**_

 _ **(Please post any grievances, corrections, or suggestions in the comments... Enjoy!)**_

* * *

 **Date: November 14th, 20XX**

 **Time: 7:50 am**

 **Location: Sakurako's Bedroom**

* * *

 _ *****RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!*****_

-An obnoxious, muffled noise wakes me from my sleep. It's coming from under my pillow, I think.  
I feel something pressed up against the back of my neck, so I instinctively reach and grab it.

It's my phone.  
Yep, must've fell asleep watching watching the new Mirakurun anime that Kyouko-Senpai suggested to me. It most likely wedged itself between the back of my neck and my pillow when I was sleeping.  
What a pain.

 _ *****RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!*****_

Damn it, it's way too early for this crap. Why is my cellphone crying? I didn't set no alarms.

 _"If you don't quit crying, i'll give you something to cry about!"_

I chuck my phone across my room, it makes a small dent in the wall on impact.

...

...

...

...

...

Thank god, some peace and quiet... (Hopefully no one notices my wall, though.)

...

...

...

 _ *****RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGG!*****_

Whelp, it looks like that plan didn't work.  
I give in.

Guess I have to go get up and see what's the matter with my phone.  
As I scoop up my phone, I notice that a big ol' phone number is stretched across its screen.  
I can't quite remember whose phone number this is supposed to be, although it's on the tip of my tongue.

Wait a second... Someone is selfishly trying to interrupt MY slumber, over a stupid phone call?  
How rude!  
It's common knowledge that if you need to call someone as important as me, you should schedule it beforehand!  
Even though I really don't feel like talking to anyone right now, i'll humor whatever whatever poor soul needs my attention, I am a good person after all.

 _"This better be important"_

I tap the green button on my phone's touch screen to answer the call.

* * *

 _"Hello? Who is this?"_ I say, successfully resisting the urge to verbally assault whoever's at the other end.  
 **-it's me, Himawari... Don't you have caller ID?-**

Of course it's that titty monster! Who else is ill-mannered and inconsiderate enough to disturb someone this early in the morning?  
 _"Why the heck are you calling me, don't you know it's early?! You woke me up!"_

 **-What, it's not "early" at all! First period is about to start and you're nowhere to be found! Are you trying to skip school? Do you actually want to become a delinquent?!-**  
What? First period? Doesn't that booby monster know that it's Sunday? She must have tits for brains!

 _"Hahhahaha first period?! It Sunday! We don't have school today, stupid."_  
 **-Sakurako, you moron! You thought that it was Sunday yesterday! Hell, it's not even Monday today... it's Wednesday! You better hurry up and get ready, or else you're going to be late to class for the 4th time in a month.-**

 _"What?! You're a liar, it's not Wednesday! It's uhhh..."_ I mumble while trying to check the date on my phone. " _-Wednesday..."_  
God dammit! I hate that she's always right... She must be a witch or something.

 _"Why didn't you wake me up, stupid Tiddywari! It's your fault I slept in again! You, and your stupid oversized chest!"_  
 **-I was late because I was waiting for you to wake up yesterday! I'm not going to be counted tardy for two days in a row due to your stupidity! ...Just get over here as fast as you can, okay?- _*Click*_**

* * *

She hung up on me?! The nerve of that girl, I oughta give her a piece of my mind when I see her!  
But, she does have a point, I guess. I should get ready to go to school, If i don't, i'll probably get kicked outta school or something.

Hmm... that doesn't seem half bad now that I think about it.

.

..

...

But then again, i'd never hear the end of it from Nadeshiko, Hanako, and that Tittymonster...  
-Yikes! Guess I'd better get ready.

After throwing all of my clothes on, I walk up to the mirror.  
"Sup', beautiful?!"  
I make finger-guns at my reflection.

What am I thinking? I ain't got no time to admire myself, I'm late! Better get going...

 _ ****SLIP**  
**_ _ **  
**************SLLAAAAAAMMMMMM**************  
**_ _"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK AAAAAAAHHHHHH"  
_ _"Stupid manga! You tripped me! What did I ever do to you?! TRAITOR!"_

I throw the treacherous book across the room in frustration.  
My elbows took the brunt of the impact, my knees are on fire.

Even though I'm in immense pain, I still manage to waddle my way out of room, making it all the way to the living room.  
Surprisingly, it's completely quiet. I scan the room for intelligent life, and determine that there's none to be found.  
(well, usually there's no intelligent life to be found here anyway, but I digress.)

It's quite peaceful without my idiot sisters here to make their obnoxious ruckus like they usually do.  
Lucky for me, I don't have to deal with their stupidity today.  
Unlucky for me, no one's here to cook me breakfast.

I know it's late and all, but I really don't feel like going to school on an empty stomach. There's no time to make a 5-star gourmet meal, but I figure that I can at least whip somthin' up. I tear the kitchen up, hoping to find something, anything that I could use to make myself a decent meal. After minute and a half of frantically searching my kitchen for ingredients, I manage to slap together a soggy bologna sandwich.

Nothing special, but it's good enough.

I sit down at my kitchen table, getting ready to take a bite out of the meal that i'd just scavenged.

 _ ***Beep***_

A noise comes from my phone sitting on the table in front of me, I look down and see that my annoying tiddymonster henchman sent me a text message.

 **-Hey, where are you? Classes are gonna start in about 10 minutes!-**

Damn, i'm later than I thought! No use in sitting down at my table to eat, I have to take it to go.  
I pounce out of my chair and dash as fast as possible to the front door.  
Just as I'm exiting my house, I look behind me and see that my kitchen looks as if it's been vandalized.

 _"What a mess... I feel bad for whoever's gonna have to clean that up!"_

* * *

The air outside is cold, unbelievably cold. Why the heck do we have to go to school when it feels like Antarctica? To top it all off, I forgot to put on any of my winter clothes because I was in too much of a hurry.  
The fact that i'm running as fast as I can isn't making my situation any better.

I feel like an idiot right now. An exhausted, cold idiot with a bologna sandwich hanging out of her mouth.  
Surely this can't get any worse.

 _ ***HOWNK!* *HWONK!***_

What was that?  
I turn around and see an angry goose, hot on my trail...  
Holy cow, it's chasing me?  
What the hell does it want?  
Usually, a pathetic bird waddling at me as fast as it can would be a hilarious sight to see, but for some reason I feel absolutely terrified.  
The creature has a certain blood thirsty look in its eyes...

Holy fucking shit, I'm going to die if I don't start running quicker!

A few moments pass...  
 _ ***HOWNK!* *HOWNK!***_  
 _ ***HOWNK!* *HOWNK!***_

I turn around, and I see that the damn thing is still on my trail.

"Whyeh _***chomp***_ arh _***munch***_ yew angreh?"

I say with my mouthful of sandwich, still running as fast as I can, struggling not to choke to death on my food.

 _ ***SSSSSQUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK***_

It makes the most hideous sound as it lunges for me.  
-I attempt to dodge it, but to no avail, instead I hit the ground like a fish.  
Instinctively, I curl up in a fetal position.  
My head feels as if it's on fire, as I feel my enemy tugging at my hair mercilessly. It's webbed feet dig into me as it yanks on my hair, the back of my neck feels as if it's being pierced by daggers.

Thoughts start going through my mind at light speed, as I see my life flashing before my eyes:

What did I do to deserve to do this?

Why, God?

Am I going to die today?  
Shit, It hurts so bad! Ouch!

I am going to die today.  
I am going to die today.

I am going to die today.  
I am going to die today.

Holy fuck.

I am going to die today...

I am going to die...  
On my knees..  
like a coward..

.

..

...

...

...

...

...

No.

NO!

I ain't no coward  
My mamma didn't raise no coward.  
I need to rise up, I am NOT going to die in the fetal position.  
If i'm gonna die, I'll die fighting for my life, on my feet.

Like a hero.

I do an alligator-style death roll, breaking free of my assailant's vice-grip on my hair.  
On my back now, face to face with the grim reaper himself; a bird.

The universe slows down. My pain fades away.  
This must be what death is.

I stare into my enemy's eyes. They're as lifeless as a corpse, bloodshot and poking out of it's head.

...Satan, Is that you?

I look down from it's eyes and it's beak catches my attention. His beak is agape, the inside of it is as dark as a tunnel.  
I feel as if I am staring into the abyss, and certainly it's staring back into me. It's almost as if it's waiting to swallow me whole.  
Continuing my inspection of the creature, I notice that its feathers are a tainted white color... Is that my blood staining its wings?  
A shocking realization comes to my mind: I'm not going to die peacefully surrounded by my friends and family...  
The last thing i'll ever see on this earth will be that hideous, demonic creature...

How cruel.

Suddenly, time goes back to normal.  
A wave of pain shoots throughout my entire body.  
My arms and legs have minds of their own, they start flailing as hard as they can. Unwillingly, I strike the bird across its beak.  
It gets knocked off my chest, landing somewhere off in the distance.

Certainly, i've made it angry.

I regain control of my body, and without thought, I rise up.

As I stand, I feel like every single muscle in my body is on fire, my bones are glass, my head as heavy as the moon.  
Even though my vision is blurry with tears, I can make out the silhouette of my attacker a few yards away.  
It lets out an ungodly screech, and lunges at me a second time.  
I brace myself for death, clenching my eyes shut as hard as I can.. The sandwich that I somehow managed to keep in my mouth this whole time falls to the floor as I scream at the top of my lungs.

 ** _"DO YOUR WORST, YOU FUCKING COWARD!"_**

A great force hits me in the gut, knocking the wind out of me and making me land flat on my ass.

* * *

I sit for a while, motionless. My eyes still are still closed.

Why is nothing happening? Why am I not being eaten alive right now?

Slowly I open my eyes, and realize something...

I'm not dead! Cold, in pain, starving, out of breath, but nonetheless I remain alive.  
I look up to see the criminal in the distance, fleeing the scene with a bologna sandwich in its mouth.  
Wait a minute... The bastard mauled me... Over a stupid bologna sandwich?!  
I'm grateful to be alive and all but, seriously?  
Great, now I have nothing to eat.  
This is going to be a long walk to school...

 _"Well, it's gonna to be more of a 'limp' than a walk."_

* * *

 _ **Author's note!**_

 **How're y'all doin' today? Good? Bad? I really don't care...** _ **  
**_

 _ **-Just kidding! I hope your day's going excellently.**_

 _ **Anyways, how did y'all like the first chapter? It's my first fic, so I hope i did well. Sorry about the weird writing style... I thought that I should do something different for my first work. I wrote it in first person present tense because it's supposed to give you a deeper connection with the character who's perspective your writing from. And Sakurako is an interesting character indeed! I thought Seeing the thought processes from a *Ahem* ...not-so-smart-person like Sakurako would be quite interesting.**_

 _ **Nevertheless, be sure to rate, and review!**_

 _ **Smell ya later!**_

 _ **-John Brown**_

 _ **(*PS* Don't be worried about Sakurako, she'll be fine! Well... Sakurako's never 'fine', but at least she's not seriously injured.)**_

* * *

 _Special thanks to fellow author ahsinam33 for encouraging me to write this, and for inspiring me with her works in general. Be sure to read all of her works if you haven't already!_

 _Also, i'd like to thank my good friend Mei for proofreading this and helping me with grammar and other such things **.**_


	2. Chapter 2 -School Sweet School!-

_**Author's note!**_

 _ **Welcome to chapter 2! I'm sorry if it took too long to write, I've been too busy with school and family. Nevertheless, now that Christmas break is hear, I have more free time to work on writing.**_

 _ **(Please post any grievances, corrections, or suggestions in the comments... Enjoy!)**_

* * *

 **Date: November 14th, 20XX**

 **Time: 8:15 am**

 **Location: The Hallway Outside Of Sakurako's First Period Class**

* * *

Never thought I'd say this, but... Thank god, I'm at school!  
I can't wait to take a nap on my nice comfy desk.

It'll be heaven. A warm, cozy heaven with no geese in site.

Just what I'm needing right about.

I hope Sensei doesn't mind me being late. At least I have a good excuse this time. Eh, it's not like she has high expectations of me anyways.  
She's probably used to it by now.

I press my face up against the window of the classroom door. She's in the middle of a lesson. The door creaks open as I inch my way into the room. Maybe if I sneak my way to my desk, I won't get in trouble for being late.

 _"SA- KO- RAAA- KOOO."_

Or, maybe not.  
How could she detect my presence? Does she have spider senses or something?

 _"Why are you lat-_ ***My teacher turns to face me*** _OH MY GOD, WHAT ON EARTH HAPPENED TO YOU?!"_

Oh yeah... I probably look like a train wreck right now.  
What should I tell her?

I look around to see all the entire class staring at me. In the back of the classroom I see Himawari. She's making a really weird face.  
Is she… Worried about me?

Pfft, nah! That stupid girl only cares about herself.  
She's probably just constipated from being too fat or something.

 _"Well, go on. What happened to you?"_

The voice of my old hag teacher draws me back to the situation at hand. I can practically feel the stares of everyone in my class.  
Oh God, I can't tell her what happened to me in front of the whole class! I'd look like a loser... Who gets beat up by a stupid bird? Everyone'll make fun of me… Especially that tiddy monster.

I need to make up a clever lie, that way no one will figure out.

 _"I uhh.. Got hit by uhh.. A-A BUS!'_

 _"You got hit by a what?! Are you okay?!"_

Flawless! She fell for it. My plan went off without any problems.

 _"Sensei can I take her to the nurse, please?"  
_ I hear the voice of my rival from across the room. I look over and see her stand up from her chair.  
One of her hands is clutching her small red purse, The other is waving in the air frantically to get the teacher's attention.

Why does she want to take me to the nurse? If my Arch enemy was mortally wounded, I'd just leave them to bleed out.  
She's probably planning something.

 _"Yes, Himawari-san. Get her there safely."_

* * *

As soon as the door shuts behind us, Himawari practically pins me up against a wall.

 _"Don't move."_ She takes her purse in her hand.

She's digging in her purse for something. I wonder what.  
Maybe she has a knife, and she's looking to end our rivalry once and for all! Holy cow, I hope not.  
I'm in no position to fight back, I'm still beaten up from my encounter with that goose, and she's got me pinned up against the wall.

If she wanted to she really could just gut me like a fish.

 _"Aha, there it is."_

She pulls out a hairbrush from her bag.  
Oh my God, I knew it. She wouldn't want to kill me with a knife, that would be too quick. She wants to see me suffer.  
OH THE HUMANITY ! I'm going to slowly get hair brush'd to death!

 _"W-what are you going to do to me, you sadistic titty monster?"  
_ _"Hey, quit squirming! I'm just going to brush your hair."_

Oh. Well, that makes much more sense than brush torture.  
She is my personal servant girl after all. It's only normal for servants to comb their master's hair.

 _"Dang, your hair really is a mess. What happened to you?"_ She says, holding up a lock of my hair.  
 _"I told you, I got hit by a bu-"  
_ "No you didn't." She continues, "if you got hit by a bus, you'd be bleeding out on the side of a road right now."

It looks like I've been outsmarted again.  
What should I tell her? I can't tell her the truth, if she finds out I got my ass handed to me by a bird, i'd never hear the end of it.

 _"Anyway, you shouldn't go walking around school with your hair looking like this."_ She says, making me loose my train of thought.  
Without another word, she gets to work fixing my hair.

My eyes are starting to get heavy from how soothing her hairbrush is. This is bliss.  
This must be how a puppy feels when you pet it.  
She really should brush my hair more often, although it is quite embarrassing.

This is actually REALLY embarrassing, now that I think about it.  
My arch nemesis is grooming me as if I was her little pet. She has me completely under her control, and I'm pretty much powerless to stop her. Although I have to admit, this really isn't the worst thing in the world.

I love being pampered by her...  
Jesus Christ, what am I thinking?!

For some reason, my cheeks feel warm. She is really close, I can feel her entire body pressed up against mine. Her face is mere centimeters away from is way too close.

I can smell her perfume.  
Bubblegum, huh?  
What a nice smell.

 _"Well, what happened?"_ I get snapped back to reality by her soft, almost motherly voice.

 _"Huh?_ " I say, momentarily forgetting what we were last talking about for half a second.  
Oh yeah, she wants to know what happened to me. I can't possibly tel her about what actually happened.

I pause for a while, and then speak. _"No, you'll... Make fun of me."_

She looks at me, running her fingers through my hair.  
 _"I won't laugh at you, I promise."_ She says with a warm smile.

Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to tell her what happened. "Okay, give me a second."  
Talking about this is harder than I thought.

I take a deep breath, and then I begin to spill my guts _"This sounds really stupid, but I think I almost died today."_  
She's staring at me sincerely, with a very worried look in her eye.

 _"My day started out bad enough. I was late for school, it was cold and I forgot my warm clothes, I barely had time to make breakfast for myself..."  
_ _"But it got worse. On the way to school, I was attacked... By a..."  
_ _"-A goose."_

I look up expecting Himawari to be laughing her ass off, but instead, she's just standing there with that same worried expression from earlier, listening closely.  
I continue my story.

 _"I was terrified,"  
_ For some reason, it's hard for me to breath.

 _"Tthat damn bird was sscratching at me, a-and biting at me..."  
_ There's something stuck in my throat.

" _I-It hhurt soo baddly a-and i was sho sccaredd,"  
_ I can feel tears running down my cheeks.

 _"I-I wwas the most terrified, I've ever been in my life..."_  
 _" **I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE, HIMAWARI!"**_

I'm sobbing uncontrollably now, words cant even come out of my mouth anymore.  
Why am I crying so much? For some reason, looking back on what happened is so painful.  
I felt so helpless, and it was so humiliating. He was just a dumb bird, but he was able to hurt me so badly.  
I feel like such a fucking idiot right now, crying like a baby over something so stupid.

-suddenly, I feel a warmth completely envelope my body. A hug.

 _"Don't cry. You're safe now."  
_ She wipes my tears off of my face,

 _"I won't let anyone or anything hurt you anymore."_

 _ ***Sniffle*** "Wwhy are you being so nice to me?" _

She looks me straight in the eyes, and says,  
 _"It's because you're my best friend, and I care about you... a lot."_

I feel all of the feelings of sorrow that I've ever had melt away. The warmth in her voice, and the serious look in those dark green eyes of hers tells me that she meant every word that she said.

She has me absolutely speechless.

I'm not crying anymore, but my cheeks are still on fire and It feels like my heart is pounding outside of my chest. Why?  
She takes my hand.

 _"Let's get you to the nurse, okay?"_

Her hand is so warm... So soft.

* * *

 _ **Author's note!**_

 **How was yall's holidays? I hope that they SUCKED!** _ **  
**_

 _ **-Just kidding! (Again...) I everything went wonderfully, and that everyone had loads of fun.**_

 _ **Did you enjoy chapter 2? Quite a lot of serious things happened, so I did my best attempt at mixing in as much humor as possible. Honestly, I felt that it was a little TOO angsty... But don't worry, this is as bad as it gets, it's all sunshine and rainbows from here!**  
 **I absolutely love fluffy, feel good fan fictions, so that's why i'm going to write one~~~**_

 _ **Be sure to send me any love letters, death threats, and everything in between! Rate, and review!**_

 _ **Smell ya later!**_

 _ **-John Brown**_

* * *

 _(Tune in next time to see Sakurako acting a hot mess!)_


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